the three layered chocolate cake at the end of the finish line

Hebrews 12:1-3 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

I am pretty tired today from playing basketball so this is going to be short. I have this sticky in my bible from a sermon by Greg Thompson (speaker down at Trinity Presbyterian in cville, who also happens to be lone of my top 5 favorite speakers of all time). This is what it says:

Running the Race of Faith
Heb 12:1-3
Step 1: look at those who have ran the race, the heroes of faith "the cloud of witnesses" v1
(I assume this is referring to all of the characters in the bible and for some reason I just imagine Job, David, Paul, Moses, Abraham, and Elijah standing on a cloud. Also, they all have awesome beards.)

Step 2: Shed the excess sin/hindrances weighing you down v2
(makes sense to me; it's impossible to run with things weighing you down)

Step 3: Focus on the perfect role model that we can turn to always, Jesus Christ
Fix your eyes on Him
Focus and look forward to the redemption of the cross
(reminds me of how back when I was little and fat, whenever I had to run the mile in PE, I would always imagine a three-layered chocolate cake at the finish line as something to motivate me)

Step 4: Consider Christ and be encouraged Fix your eyes on Him, look heavenward and shed the hindrances!
("For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are -  yet without sin. 16 Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may RECEIVE mercy and FIND grace to help us in our time of need" Heb 4:15 crucial find d chao)

you know how when you rediscover a song you listened to on repeat back in the day is amazing? I think rediscovering/ re-finding grace kind of gives me the same goosebumps.

Jesus friend of sinners

For the past few weeks, I've been working from home while waiting for some paperwork to go through before I can get started on my first project.  By and large, I've just wasted time watching movies, sending out emails, and making a few phone calls here and there. But today, for the first time "on the beach/bench" I had what I considered a "productive" day working from home.

It wasn't productive in the sense that I actually provided any value whatsoever to my company (because I certainly didn't), but instead because after a short conference call around noon, I decided to start watching Matt Chandler sermons online while playing Nerts (a card game I just learned at a retreat) on my cell phone. While it sounds terrible, I actually focus very well while playing card games/scrabble on my phone.  I started honing this skill during high school (in physics) and really refined it during college (this is quite remarkable because in general, I am terrible at multitasking and if I were to literally do anything else while listening, I would retain none of it).

Anyways, while playing Nerts, I stumbled upon this video.  I saw it was 48 minutes long and like any short attention-spanned, millenial gen-er, I skipped it immediately. However, shortly after watching five or six short 2-3 minute videos, I decided to start watching [listening to] it because a longer video meant I could play Nerts with fewer interruptions caused by selecting a new video after each one ended (shame is my name).

Anyways, while I realize asking you watch all 48 minutes of it is pretty unreasonable, I would recommend you watch 36:00-41:23.

Recently I've been struggling with wallowing in my own sinfulness. It's like being stuck in a vat of self-pity and sorrow, where the more you think about your sin, the deeper the vat becomes. Anyways, Chandler really encouraged me during this video talking about how we all may be sinners but we are just "junior varsity" compared to likes of David (adulterer, murderer but still called a man after God's own heart), and Saul, who was so far gone (the "chief of sinners") that his whole salvation seems as if it occurred to show us that we haven't gone too far. It reminded me that there really is nothing that God can't redeem and that "God loves us as we are now, not for who we might become."

"No sin in our life has more power than the cross of Jesus Christ."

Rom 8:1-2 -  "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death."

treasure huntin'

Matthew 6:19-21 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Yesterday during sunday school, I taught the middle school class for the first time in my life (I've been doing high school up until now).  The middle school class consists of 4 girls, Candice, Amanda, Emily, and Anna, all between the ages of 12-14. Needless to say, it was terrifying. I basically spent the first 15 minutes of class trying to figure out what's cool these days (apparently hunger games, and the word "groety" (sp?)) and laughing at jokes that I didn't actually get.

Anyways, I was going over this passage again today and was reminded of 1 John 2:17 ("This world is fading, and everything it craves, but if you do the will of God, then you will live forever"). I was thinking of how really coming to terms with this passage is so difficult. I feel like the luxury and comforts of this world constantly try to program us into believing that this world is all we need for happiness.  

Paul calls for us to no longer conform to the pattern of the world (but be transformed by the renewing of our mind so that we may test God's good, pleasing, and perfect will. - Rom12:2) but man, I feel like as time progresses, the luxuries and lavishness of this world just become harder and harder to resist.

Whatever, I need to stop trying to serve to masters (v24) and really live my life for something greater; something that won't rust and can't be stolen.

peace, love, and blessings.

a sermon a day

I know my last post idea didnt work out so well (read: mega, colossal, paragon of failure) but I decided to embark on a [hopefully] more fruitful journey instead. My tentative plan is to try to blog about what I'm reading in the bible and preach a small, short sermon to myself each day. I've realized that the past year or so, I've been getting overly content with my faith and decided that I really needed to push myself to get to know God better and want to desire Him more.  I figure blogging will be a good way to keep the gospel fresh and myself accountable (I contemplated doing a secret journal but decided I'm not secure enough with my manliness to do that yet).

Anyways, hopefully through this blog, I can keep myself on the narrow path, share some encouraging passages with my future self (and anyone else who reads this), and make His truths and mercies new, fresh, and real every morning/night.

allow me to reintroduce myself

Ive decided to come back to blogging, fiercer and less coherent than ever before. I feel like my blog posts in the past have mostly been stream of consciousness, which has been nice because it allowed me to just express whatever is on my mind at that exact moment to capture somewhat of a mental snapshot of who I was that day (A philosopher named Davidoff, who I promise I am not making up, said that everyday you die, and are reborn a new person because of the things you learned yesterday). So anyways, in the past, I've been a really big fan of this SOC style because I feel like it generally makes for a more genuine and intimate (but albeit, scattered) blog. However, in an effort to change it up, I think I'm going to try to start focusing my entries around a topic instead, specifically things I'm learning/realizing. I want to try to do this because I feel like it will help me internalize and explicitly challenge myself to think about and try to learn from everything that God is doing in my life and help me learn more about myself.

Warning: As with anything I try, I may decide this is too hard and just give up because I would rather have a mish-mash of word jumbled stream of consciousness than a bunch of forced "I have learned how important...uh... integrity is" entries.

word.

graduation

im pretty tired from going to bed so late yesterday night and waking up so early this morning so this post will most likely be incoherent.

so college graduation is a lot different from high school graduation. i think the biggest difference is that i dont know most of the people graduating with me. most of my [very limited set of] friends either are in different schools (college, comm school) or just not graduating this year. so while high school graduation was all about hugging friends who youve hung out with during lunch time, classes, and after school activities throughout 4 years of high school, college graduation was just you being thrown together with random group members that you awkwardly smile at as you pass each other on grounds.

regardless, stepping onto the lawn with 1294028305 people cheering [not] you on was pretty surreal. while walking down, dan asked this lady in the front row of the audience what time she got there and she answered 5:20..am that blew my mind. why would you wait 6 hours to get a glimpse of your son/daugther/whatever for 10, 15 seconds max?? and what about the people that fly all over the world just to watch for 6 seconds as their kid's name is called. i just find the whole thing inefficient. i think the whole idea of watching graduation is weird. i feel like i would almost prefer it if they just gave me the diploma in a back room on the last day of classes (this is probably the hermit side of me speaking). i also feel really bad for making people sit through an hour of names and random awards before im called. i mean, if i find it incredibly boring, i cant imagine what its like for others.

also, they messed up my diploma so i have a piece of poster paper with a 8x11 IOU taped on it from eschool. yeah, haha.

cool. got a couple weeks to chill before work. gonna be in cville this week by myself so it should be some good quiet personal time before i start work. i plan to get fat now.

peace.

my day just made your day look like cspan2

i woke up today around 9am, crushed some special k fruit n yogurt, finished laundry and went to asian fusion (always satisfying). got home and drank 934582435 glasses of water. shortly after, i went to the gym to work out, then shot around after i could no longer lift my arms. this was a bad idea. i got challenged by this white guy to one-on-one, and for having really sore arm muscles, i was doing okay at first.. until that kid realized he could dunk. yeah so stupid.

so right after that i left afc (sans dignity), i picked up a "mango something something blast" smoothie from smoothie king with my roommate (buy one get one free coupon). sometimes i wonder why smoothie flavors are so much more in your face than regular beverages. theyre all like "strawberry kiwi explosion" or "banana berry blast". its like, whoa, whoa, calm down. i just want a drink, not fourth of july fireworks.

anyways, after that, we went rock climbing at this joint downtown. it was tighttt (esp. the butt harness, haha). so it was my first time and im mildly terrified of heights but it was awesome. its sort of like snowboarding in how once you get used to it, you get desensitized to the danger and become more and more reckless. for instance, towards the end, id just jump off to see if my roommate was still paying attention while holding the safety cable. we climbed until we could no longer feel our hands.

then we went to chipotle. i downed a steak burrito bowl and immediately after, we went to the afc pool (yeah, good ideas all around). i suck at swimming. like really really suck. i tried to swim a lap but came to a critical life decision that if i were to ever get stuck in a swim or die situation, id choose die in a heartbeat. after this realization, i went to the hot tub to get mad wrinkly. once raisined, i went to the sauna cause i wanted to feel sophisticated, but honestly, i have no idea what the purpose of a sauna is. i decided to leave once i started questioning whether the water dripping down my back was water or sweat.

my muscles are obliterated right now. tennis in 15. if i die, ill die like i was born.. awesome and beautiful, ahahah.